.Publisher's Details: The adhering to is the text message of a character from Exploration Three Leader Frank L. Culbertson (Leader, USN Resigned), reviewing the activities of September 11.September 12, 2001 7:34 p.m.I haven't composed significantly concerning specifics of this particular mission throughout the month I have actually been actually listed below, primarily for two factors: the first being actually that there has actually been incredibly little opportunity to accomplish that type of writing, and also furthermore, since I am actually not sure exactly how comfortable I am discussing thought and feelings I show to friends and family with the remainder of the world.Well, certainly the world altered today. What I claim or perform is actually incredibly minor reviewed to the significance of what took place to our country today when it was struck through ... by whom? Revolutionaries is actually all we understand, I suspect. Hard to know at whom to direct our anger as well as concern ...I had merely ended up a number of duties this morning, one of the most taxing being actually the physical exams of all workers participants. In a private talk following that, the trip cosmetic surgeon told me they were actually possessing a very poor time on the ground. I had no idea ...He explained the situation to me as best he recognized it at ~ 0900 CDT. I was actually flabbergasted, then alarmed. My very first thought was that this had not been a real talk, that I was actually still paying attention to some of my Tom Clancy tapes. It simply didn't seem to be feasible on this scale in our country. I couldn't also think of the details, also before the information of more destruction started coming in.Vladimir dropped in pretty promptly, picking up that one thing really severe was being covered. I waved Michael in to the module as well. They were actually additionally blown away and also stunned. After our company signed off, I attempted to describe to Vladimir as well as Michael as finest I could the potential immensity of the show of horror in midtown Manhattan and at the Pentagon. They accurately comprehended and also were actually extremely supportive.I browsed the World Chart on the computer system to find where over the globe we were actually and also noticed that we were actually coming southeast out of Canada as well as would be passing over New England in a few minutes. I zoomed around the terminal until I discovered a home window that would certainly give me a perspective of NYC and nabbed the nearest video camera. It happened to become a video camera, as well as I was actually looking south coming from the home window of Michael's log cabin.The smoke cigarettes seemed to have an odd flower to it at the foundation of the column that was actually streaming south of the urban area. After reading some of the newspaper article our company merely acquired, I think our team were actually taking a look at NY around the time of, or shortly after, the crash of the 2nd high rise. How horrible ...I swept the video camera during the East Shore to the south to see if I might observe any other smoke cigarettes around Washington, or anywhere else, yet absolutely nothing showed up.It was actually pretty difficult to deal with work after that, though our experts had some to perform, but on the following orbit our team went across the US further south. All three of us were actually working 1 or 2 cameras to try to get sights of New York or Washington. There was fog over Washington, but no specific source might be viewed. All of it appeared awesome from two to three hundred miles away. I can not envision the unfortunate scenes on the ground.Other than the psychological influence of our country being actually dealt with and also hundreds of our people and perhaps some close friends being actually killed, the best difficult feeling being actually where I am is just one of isolation.Upcoming time ... I suppose the fatigue and emotional pressure received the best of me. I couldn't keep awake and also remain to create. Today was actually still challenging, yet our team began receiving even more info, plus our company possessed the tribute of chatting directly with the Center Supervisor, Roy Estess, that assured our company that the ground staffs would continue to operate and also ensure our protection, and also the risk-free operation of the Place. Our team likewise learnt through our Administrator, Mr. Goldin, that added that the partners in the Plan are all absolutely dedicated to continuing risk-free functions and support. These were actually never questions for me. I know all these individuals! The ground groups have actually been actually unbelievably supporting, extremely understanding of the influence of the news, and also have actually made an effort to become as helpful as achievable. They have actually all been quite qualified and focused though I can't envision the disturbance of the sort of headlines can be found in as well as the thought and feelings that authorities structures could be in jeopardy. They certainly never bypassed a beat, also when moving nerve center. And also a team of senior employees and good friends provided our company a quite complete instruction about what was actually known and also what was actually being actually performed in the federal government as well as at NASA on Tuesday mid-day, which was very beneficial and type of all of them to accomplish in the midst of all the distress. The Russian TsUP has actually additionally been supporting and also useful, attempting to uplink newspaper article when our own assets were inoperable, and also pointing out kind words ...My crewmates have actually been actually wonderful, also. They recognize it is actually been a hard time for me as well as the people on the ground, and they've tried to be as even keeled and also practical as possible. Michael also corrected me my favorite Borscht soup for supper. And they provide me a lot of area to presume when I needed it. They are incredibly compassionate and also naturally outraged at whoever would perform this.I understand plenty of folks in Washington, many folks who journey to DC and New York City, a lot of who are flies, that I felt sure I would certainly receive at least a couple of pieces of problem over the upcoming handful of times. I received the first one today when I discovered that the Captain of the American Airlines jet that reached the Pentagon was actually Chic Burlingame, a friend of mine. I encountered Chic during the course of plebe summer months when our company remained in the D&B with each other, as well as our company had lots of courses together. I can not visualize what he should of gone through, as well as now I hear that he might have risen better than our company can easily even consider by perhaps avoiding his aircraft from being the one to deal with the White Property. What a dreadful loss, yet I make sure Chic was actually combating bravely to the end. As well as tears don't flow the same precede ...It is actually difficult to illustrate how it experiences to be the only American entirely off the earth at a time including this. The feeling that I must be there along with all of you, dealing with this, aiding somehow, is actually frustrating. I understand that our team get on the threshold (or past) of a dreadful switch in the record of the planet. Many points will never ever be the same once again after September 11, 2001. Certainly not just for the thousands as well as lots of people directly affected by these hideous process of terrorism, but possibly for everyone. We will certainly find ourselves really feeling differently regarding lots of things, including possibly space exploration, regrettably.It is actually terrible to observe smoke pouring from injuries in your very own nation from such an awesome point of view. The dichotomy of performing a space capsule committed to strengthening life on the planet and seeing lifestyle being actually damaged by such intentional, horrendous acts is actually jolting to the subconscious, no matter who you are actually. As well as the understanding that every thing are going to be various than when our team released by the time our company land is a little bit of disconcerting. I believe in our country and also in our leadership that we will do every thing feasible to far better protect her as well as our households, and also to take compensation for what has actually been actually performed. I have self-confidence that the good people at NASA will definitely perform everything necessary to continue our mission properly and also return our team safely and securely at the right time. And I miss every one of you quite. I can not exist along with you personally, as well as our team have a long way to head to complete our goal, yet be particular that my heart is actually with you, and also understand you remain in my prayers.Submissively, Frank.September 14, 2001 10:49 p.m. An improve to the final letter ... Thankfully, it's been actually an active week up right here. As well as to show that, like our nation, our company are actually continuing on our desired course with organization customarily (as much as achievable). Tonight the latest add-on to the station, the Russian Docking Chamber are going to be released from Baikonur, Kazakhstan. On Saturday evening (US opportunity), it will certainly dock with us, at a slot certainly never utilized prior to on the nadir side of the Company Module. This new element will provide us another spot to dock a Progress or Soyuz and are going to provide a large airlock along with two useable hatches for administering EVA's in Russian Orlan suits, which our company are going to do a few of prior to our experts come home.The concern before in taking care of this week was inadequate updates. The problem today is a lot of. It arrived at one time when e-mail was rejuvenated, and there's inadequate time to read everything! Plus it is actually as well difficult to cope with all of it simultaneously. However I appreciate acquiring it, as well as I truly cherish the wonderful letters of help as well as friendship I am actually acquiring.We are actually prospering aboard, receiving our work performed, and discussing traits. Final evening our experts had a lengthy discussion over dinner regarding the value of these events, the possible actions to adhere to, and what ought to be carried out. After dinner, Michael made a point of telling me that every email he obtained coming from pals in Russia pointed out especially to tell me just how regretful they were actually that this happened, extending their acknowledgements, and also talking to just how I was actually performing. Vladimir educated me the Russian term for "condolences" after speaking to the previous CDR, Yuri Usachev, on the phone in Star City. (Both the Russian as well as the English terms are actually considerably very lengthy to pronounce simply.) Quite types individuals.For the final 2 times, the Russian MCC has actually sufficed to transfer live shows of broadcast updates concerning the celebration as well as affiliated tales, to make sure I was well updated. Every professional who has come on free throw line to explain an operation or a complication contends some point stretched greetings to me along with kind words. Tonight the Russian capcom informed our company that due to the big day of recognition in the US, throughout the day individuals had been carrying florals and also lining all the walls of the US consulate in Moscow, as well as this evening they were actually igniting candles in the street outside the consular office. Just how the planet has actually changed.Folks anywhere seem to be to acknowledge the senselessness and also horror in this particular attack. And the incredible reduction. Moscow has actually managed these sort of concerns in the last few years with home as well as subway bombings, so they are actually as anxious to do away with this hazard as our company are actually. However all-time low collection is actually that there are great people all over who would like to live in peace. I review that a little one talked to, "America is therefore excellent to various other nations, our company regularly help everyone, just how can they loathe us a lot?".I really hope the instance of participation and also rely on that this space capsule and all people in the program demonstrate daily will someday influence the remainder of the world to function the same way. They must!However, our company won't be taking flight over the United States while folks are actually lighting candle lights. Do not know if our company could observe that anyhow. Our team did, however, see a really unusual and wonderful attraction a few minutes ago: the launch of our Docking Area on a Soyuz booster. Our company were surpassing it and also it emerged concerning 3 moments after its own launch coming from Baikonur as the sunshine hit our terminal, so it was actually still in the dark. It seemed like a huge comet with a right, wide rear silhouetted against the black planet underneath. Despite some poor lighting fixtures for a while as the sun hit our window at a reduced angle, I handled some online video of it as to begin with our team passed the spacecraft, and then enjoyed it start to catch up as it gained height and also speed. I filmed till major engine deadline and booster separation happened equally as we moved toward dawn on the Himalayas. An extraordinary sight in a memorable week ...Life happens, even in space. We are actually here to keep ... Frank.